Do you wanna build a snowman?

It came up on my Facebook "on this day."

 The snowman.

At the time, I told everyone it was a random snowman I had encountered.

It wasn't.

I had helped build it, earlier that day.

Can you tell by my smile how happy I was?

That morning we had a snowfall that I could not resist; I had taken an extra twenty minutes after arriving at work to run down the Constellation, enchanted by the sparkling snow and fairy world it created.

 Soooo enchanting.  

Once at my desk I found I could not stand to be inside, and begged a day to drum up support for a fundraiser.  I spent the morning visiting businesses, and at lunch thought of a friend who had the day off.  

I decided to ask if they wanted to build a snowman.

The answer was a resounding yes.

I ended up taking off the afternoon, and we completed our masterpiece just before dark.

 Yes, he has arms.  Yes, that is what you think it is.

I hadn't played like this in years.

In the months to come I had many more days of play, work and adventure with this friend...but this was the day things changed.  The day we built a snowman.

One of my favorite songs is Bob Hope lustfully singing "Thanks for the Memories."  It reminds me to think of the good with the bad, and recall days when hope flourished.

This was the day that hope first sprung anew after a long struggle to keep a marriage afloat.  While that friendship remained nothing but that-just a friendship-it was the first time I saw a possibility of happiness.

I was sooooo naive.

Today I sit at the same Constellation trailhead, waiting for the motivation to get out of the car and start exercising, again.

Yes, again.

I already went out once.

 Um, yeah.  Williamson Valley trail.

 

This was mild.

The mud was so thick I had to call it.  I know it only gets worse-this is my trail, afterall.  I decided to head over to the Constellation...maybe it would be better.

Instead I'm sitting in my car.

Thinking of the enchanting walk I took in these woods one year ago today...of sitting in this very spot at 4:30am waiting to hike on summer mornings, of meeting a friend and climbing in one car to hike elsewhere.  

It's easier to sit here...because I'm already tired.

Because my chin may be permanently scarred and still hurts.  Because my body is very angry about the steroids and antibiotics I took this week and has made it clear to me I upset its delicate flora.  Because I'm not inspired, and I don't want to move (I already did, it took 45 minutes to extract myself from the mud!) and in actuality I did just exercise - my sweat proves it.

The last time I hiked Williamson valley trail in the mud I was with the King, about three years ago.  I had on boots, but the mud was insane.  It caked on like crazy, and we laughed despite the irritation.  This time, my body already irritated, I haven't been able to laugh it off.

This is why people quit.  Emotionally, they get set off. Things don't go as plan, circumstances change.  I left the house geeked to run; instead I had a mud hike that was miserable.  

I decided not to do Constellation...I am a sweaty mess, so yes. I did exercise.  I don't need something to "make me feel better" or feel guilty I didn't get in my run.  A benefit of solo exercise I am learning is I answer to no one.  

 Who knew this applied to exercise?

It's ok....and I'll find another trail.  

Now to just find the inspiration to find it😜😎