Running into the Law

"In a relationship, intelligence is knowing what has happened in the past.  Wisdom is how you approach it, and focus should be on the future, not the past.

I think."

 Hmmmmm.

I've been chewing on that trifecta I discovered earlier this week, and texted the above to an acquaintance.  This theory, or hypothesis if you will (just what IS the better term?  My science is rusty!) is that the three working together give the best results.  In anything!  Business, relationships, exercise.

Exercise.

I was thwarted yesterday.  I got off early, and had but one Ride task to attend to.

 Instead of a run, I looked at this for an hour.

It took me that full hour to notice what was wrong, too. 😂😂

By the time I was finished, sunset was in twenty minutes...and I was fifteen minutes from the trailhead.

Sigh.

 Right there with ya, kid.

As I mulled over intelligence (is this something we are born with?  Can it be cultivated?) vs. wisdom (only gained by experience?  Can it be taught?) I noted my focus was again on something I did not have:  time.

 

And yet I own a time machine....

Time.  Slowing down.

Enjoying what is, right now.

 No caption necessary.

Last week, I met a man for the first time.  He left quite the impression, and I've not stopped thinking about him since.  By Monday, my overactive brain had already over analyzed every detail...and I desperately sought some control.  Mentioning that fact in happenstance to Russ, he backed me right up to it.

"Why do you need control?  Can't you just slow down and enjoy whatever the outcome is?"

 He's a plant killer, but he was right.

I can enjoy a journey even if the outcome isn't what I desire.

All I have to do is change my focus.

 

Their focus is laser sharp:)

Since January, my focus has been on the fact that I have "no control" until May 21, 2020.  That's the day after my youngest graduates; now unwittingly being in 100% custody of my two youngest I "know" I'll be "stuck in Chino" until then.

But what if.

What if I slowed down and relaxed.  Enjoyed this journey as never before.  Instead of searching for what I desire, what if I just enjoyed the ride, regardless of the outcome.

 Pure and utter joy, these two.

Right now, I'm suffering from one of the worst cold sores I've ever had.  Heavy stress always ends in an outbreak, this one (despite taking anti-viral, abreva and lysine!) is literally driving me away from the crowds.  For although I learned long ago to still have confidence while looking grotesque (this is NOT and exaggeration) I simply don't want to have to expose others to what they can't unsee!!  That said, on this Thanksgiving Day, I am taking stock of what it (and all other things) in my life mean:

The stress I created by focusing on what I don't have (freedom to leave, a healthy romantic relationship, a job that I'm actually qualified for vs over qualified for, time for my business...just to name a few!) eliminated the joy of what I do have:  a beautiful home in my favorite place on earth, many very healthy friendships,  a job that allows me tremendous creative freedom (plus four tens!) and a blossoming new venture. Slowing down actually allows me to better structure my time, but the kick in the pants this week was Russ' words:

"Why do you need control?  Can't you just slow down and enjoy whatever the outcome is?"

 A desired outcome, as enjoying a scarlet and grey bumper sticker on my vehicle if they lose rather questionable, but the rivalry smack talk with Flyboy?  Priceless.

Long ago, I learned to never base my happiness on a football team's ability to win or lose.

 But this?  This is hysterical!

I'm learning now that no matter how much intelligence I have, unless I apply wisdom to a situation, and focus on a) what needs/has to be done b) solutions/actions to such needs and c) taking accountability for the outcome regardless of what it is happiness will be elusive.

Amazing the influence of a man I just met last week.

Interestingly, I've not talked to him since.  A few texts, nothing more.  In the past, my heart would have been crushed.  

Not anymore.

I'm enjoying my journey.  Perhaps he will appear again, or perhaps it was just a stop along the way.  My desires are genuinely irrelevant-if it's not shared there's no need to dwell on it.  It matters not that he ticked all my boxes, or that there was chemistry and a spark.  If it works, I'll be delighted.

What matters now is the fact I'm enjoying this outcome.

Intelligence, wisdom & focus.

Thank you.