Week Five of Stretching

10 minutes.

Every.

Single.

Morning....at 6am.

Thankfully these are gracing my desk the last week and a half...and since we stretch in my office it’s at least pretty.

So I’ve not done well at not complaining...the last week I’ve been super tired. The eye ulcer still is not healed completely, and I’m pretty worn out.

The dark circles are very disturbing to me.

So, it should be a habit, but it’s not.  Stretching is a necessary evil, and my lack of enthusiasm and poor form last week means I pulled a hip/glute muscle that flares up when I drive long distance.

Seeing  as I have a 200 miles commute once a week, that’s sooooo not fun.

But what is fun?

Thrifting and finding exactly what you need for a new business venture, and having no issues squatting and standing back up.

What’s super super amazing? Deciding the “bad guy” in a story scenario should be a Steelers fan and finding this hat at a thrift store soon after (and over 2000 miles away from Pittsburgh, too!)

Lol, my “stealer” is gonna be a Steeler. 😂😂 #brownstwitter

Speaking of Browns Twitter, I was enlightened recently to the word “zaddy.”  It’s my new favorite word, as it aptly describes the Buckeye; however the definition is not family friendly, so if you’re over 18 go look it up in the urban dictionary.

He says he doesn’t like the cat😂

After a great start to the new year, the Princess and I have struggled a bit this week.

This sunset!!!!!! Surely the heavens declare the work of His hands!

We both started strong, 21 days in of kicking butt...but I think we are both a little tired. It’s a lot, doing everything we are doing. 

Also working more than ever is Manchild.

We’ve discovered he’s a natural born salesman, much like his mother.

He’s doing Special Olympics on Friday’s with the Buckeye, and has added in church on Tuesday nights. Now there’s the occasional weekend selling gig, and he’s been asked to help bounce...which both his dad and stepdad did at his age. That his mama isn’t too sure about....!!!

The Commander took off for a weekend in Michigan this morning, as her lifelong BFF is getting married and she’s the Maid of Honor.  Dress shopping is their goal for the August wedding.

My children look nothing like me....I suppose that’s good?!

So while I struggle to wake up some mornings, the benefit is my joints are working better. Yeah, I probably pulled something doing stretches poorly when I whined, but that’s on me. What is good to see is my nearly all-grown up children doing well (while the Princess has struggled a bit, it’s only because she’s taking on a lot, and has a little adjusting to do.)

A little adjusting to do. That’s probably the best advice I could give myself: you can make it all work, there’s just a little adjusting to do.

Fitness quest:  keeping it real.

Week Four of Stretching

Well I’m thoroughly over this.

It’s not night...it’s morning.

Four weeks in and I’m ready to quit.

The Buckeye says he’s fine to do it alone; that made me cry, which didn’t help my pounding head.

My eyes are very, very overworked.

So apparently, the eye ulcer of several weeks ago never healed; what I thought was a bad sinus infection was actually a partially healed ulcer. The oral steroids I’d been prescribed staved off the worse of the pain, and it wasn’t until I finished them the pain came back so badly I wondered if it was actually my eye.

The oral steroids also were why I gained three pounds in one week while on limited calories; I lost all of it the weekend after I finished the prescription.  Just water weight, so that mystery was solved. As for my head, I was beginning to wonder just how messed up I was-when I read that oral steroids were sometimes used to treat eye ulcers. I wondered if I hadn’t been misdiagnosed, and restarted a full regime with my eye...and immediately started to improve.

Except now I’m worn out.

And over tired.

And an emotional wreck.

So no, I don’t want to get out of bed at 6am to stretch, and be at my desk working at 6:30am.  Not so the Buckeye, who loves our new routine.

He’s like a twist between every football coach in an inspirational movie and Eeyore as of late. 

Ride is in a pinch; it’s been cold, which means people don’t ride carts. While I have a new revenue stream I’m working on, it’s not quite ready to launch, and is taking up huge amounts of time. I’m discouraged, trying to keep my head above water, and I’ve been in pain for about a week now.

Plain and simple, I want to quit.

I don’t want to drive 200 miles tomorrow. I don’t want to be stressed about Ride bills that piled up when the Buckeye was injured. I don’t want to get healthy, eat healthy or stretch. I most certainly don’t want to do all of that while dealing with other people’s doubts and fears.

Despite being over 21 days in...stretching is not a habit.

Eating better in general, however, kinda is.

So this morning when I was flapping my wrists instead of doing arm circles, I was looking for a chuckle.  A smile. An easy reward for climbing out of bed when miserable, and doing the right thing when I really, truly, did not want to do the right thing.

Except it wasn’t taken that way.

It’s hard to photograph sunrises; believe it or not the sky was even more vibrant than this!

While the Buckeye doesn’t mind doing it alone, he doesn’t realize I won’t do it alone right now. I’m barely staying above water, and he’s my buoy in these waves. For when a woman’s life becomes overwhelming, she gets rid of the last thing she added.

In this case: stretching, dieting and Gaelic.

Although apparently I’ve earned  “crowns” so you know that’s not being ditched anytime soon.

Funny how I’ve added 233 words of Gaelic (I’m comfortable with about 100, and sentence structure is making more sense) but that’s not overwhelming and everything else is.

Of course, I’m rewarded with a singing bell when I get a lesson right, and flaming circles of love and explanation points daily....

My body doesn’t seem much different after four weeks. Yes, I can easily stand up now from a squat. My muscles aren’t as sore, and most importantly, my upper back pain is gone. I seem to have worked through the initial soreness...and we are at ten minutes a day.  I *know* I need to keep it up.

But I really want to sleep. Just once....or just until I feel better.

I’ve been failed repeatedly by dieting and exercise...so there’s no hope in just them.  Only with a partner have I ever truly succeeded.

Who lately assured me they don’t mind doing it alone.

Fitness quest. 

Keeping it real.

Week Three of stretching: Not quite a habit

You can tell it’s early, as I’m not capitalizing properly.

Early also means you lose your glasses on your blanket on the bed....

Well, this week we missed a few days. New Year’s Day we took it easy...sleeping in after our “night out.”

Doesn’t my man look fine?!?

What’s funny is we left at 6pm, and were home by 11pm.

My favorite photo from the night. He was turning towards me for a kiss...and I love what it captured.  Love. Proven love through what was the most difficult year...still strong despite the storms. 

As the New Year starts, we’ve taken a different view of life, and what we wish it to look like. That started weeks ago, with me starting to stretch, and the Buckeye stepping out in faith. So here we are, a bit further in to our “new year” than most. What we’ve decided?

We’re no longer young😂😂😂

The Buckeye says we’re old, I say we are middle age; we didn’t even bother to stay up until midnight! Stretching (nearly) daily has shown us we are far from our youth; after skipping New Year’s, we hit January 2nd with no difficulty. But Friday the Third the Buckeye had to leave super early for work, and Saturday we had to drive to California and back.

Our diets suffered, lol.

So just four days in to 2020, we’d only stretched once and eaten a day of junk food.  Sunday was a definite wake up call.

Stretching was hard.

Not mentally hard to get back at it, but hard in that we’d both lost some balance, and had obvious tightening.  It was, frankly, shocking.

And a big wake up to our middle age.

Suddenly it made sense how people ten-fifteen years older than us had difficulty getting around. While we both hiked regularly, we both have desk jobs. We aren’t often moving.

So we got back to it.  Added more minutes, and now we are at eight a day. We discussed the merits of time, and decided 15-20 would be optimum. We argued about adding cardio at some point, and I had lofty ideas about Pilates. For now, we are stretching, and building a habit...and we aren’t there yet.

Same with the diet.

We’d thought to go back to 5-2, and last week reset our Lose It! Apps up. It’s a simple calorie counter, and it’s a huge reminder to be careful what you eat. I took all my clothes out of the closet that were too small, and told myself if I don’t fit into them by mid spring I’d have to donate them (a huge potential sentimental loss!)

He has kilt goals now, so he has inspiration, too:)

Thus far I’ve stayed under the calories I’d need to lose 1.5lbs a week.

Hang on, let me go weigh myself this week to see if my body has cooperated.  I’m guessing it has not, sooo...and yep.

I’ve gained a pound.

This is totally unsurprising, as this has happened EVERY TIME I START A DIET.

So apparently I weighed those chips wrong😜

Anywise.

Diets are started, but lifestyle changes are being attempted. I’m ok with bumps for now.  A few missed days of stretching resulted in immediate loss of inches reaching for my toes; it was a great reminder that I alone can fix my body. A gained pound means I ate 140 chips instead of 40 chips, and when you cheat counting calories, you’ll alway end up getting caught.

Welp.

At least I’ve been to my happy place, Home Depot.

So, I’m far from perfect...but there’s a difference this time. 

I have an actual plan.  And I’m determined to make it a reality.:)

Week Two of Stretching

So the day I started stretching was also the day I started Duolingo.

Beag is small and snog is nice....the irony.

I chose to learn Gaelic as that was how I discovered the app:  Gaelic Duolingo was referenced on Twitter (as I follow numerous Scottish accounts.). It was quite fun, which was surprising. I’ve failed at all other attempts to learn another language; even dropping out of my Spanish course in college. To be honest, the method of learning bored me...until now. I’m loving my daily 5-10 minute lesson...and wish I had picked Portuguese instead!!  Now two weeks in, I’m pretty invested in continuing studying Gaelic....but it has made me wonder. I’m doing something I never could do before, simple because it’s being presented differently.

Stretching.....wow.

The Buckeye, my partner.

I am two weeks in, and the Buckeye is ten days in.  We are at 7 minutes a day as of this morning; adding a minute or so more each week.

I know it’s only 5 minutes. But it’s freaking everyday for 5 minutes.

Two weeks ago, I figured I could stretch for 5 minutes a day, and drug an old yoga mat into my office. A few days in, I invited my husband to join me.  It was just 5 minutes...and yet I was SORE. Like I’d had a huge workout sore!!!  Hubby quickly found he felt the same...and this is despite the fact he hikes 2 times a week and I hike at least once. How could we be so sore from simply 5 minutes?!?

Plus walking the dog daily...it’s not like we just sit all day!

The fact he was so sore impressed Hubby we were really on to something....and he insisted we do it first thing every morning. Which meant prior to him leaving for work.

At zero dark thirty.

So for several different days now....the two work days after Christmas and this first week after, I’ve dragged myself from my warm bed to my office....where the ever cheerful Buckeye has our two mats out and waiting.

And it’s so hard.

Hard to get out of my warm bed. Hard to even think of stretching...because I dread how I may feel after.

Nauseous, and lately increasingly sore.

After massive googling, I’m learning to keep my head tilted in one direction.  If I don’t, my tummy gets upset for several hours, not unlike prior yoga experiences.  It has nothing to do with food and everything to do with my neck.  Thus far, I’ve had few days ays without nausea...and I’m hopeful. Because I don’t mind the stretches...and very funnily, the Buckeye does!

We get started, he starts to complain...when all of my complaining is beforehand. In this we are a perfect match...his strength gets me going and my strength keeps him going.

It’s a new camaraderie between us...and it’s so good.  As we form this habit together, I mused that perhaps in time we could mix up other things in the proposed thirty minutes we would allot.

This Buckeye is increasingly happy as of late.

He readily agreed...as he sees our future very much entwined. I’m thinking that maybe exercise just needed to be presented to me in a different way for me to see success...even though we are far from the mere habit of it! As I tucked away the fact I now “know” 175 words of Gaelic, I wonder how many improvements my body has seen since I started stretching daily.  My newest accomplishment? I can bend down and stand back up without using my arms to pull/push myself up. In 5 simple minutes a day.  Add to that the fact my upper back pain is gone. This is just two weeks in....what more awaits?

We shall see:)

Week One in the Books: Stretching

It’s Christmas Day.

This was the first (and last!) day we had gifts under the tree!

It also marked the eighth day in a row I’ve done two things: stretch, and practice Scottish Gaelic.

I also found treasure while hiking, likely for the eighth time.

Stretching.  Three days in, I invited the Buckeye to join me.

Because while we clean up well, we both are about equal when it comes to fitness since his accident a year ago.

Join me he did, and I’m so glad for it.  You see, I would have quit three days ago.  I was getting discouraged by it, and frankly, I was sore.

From FIVE MINUTES OF STRETCHING.

No cardio, no Pilates, no yoga....just five minutes of stretches.

Which DOES burn 27 calories, but still.

The past few days, my thighs have protested. My upper back pain, however?

Gone.

I’m ridiculously pleased I exercised my way out of pain....but even more pleased I no longer work at the building behind me....

Last night at Christmas Eve service I noticed I stood taller, since my shoulders weren’t pulling forward. I noticed my hips went into position better, too, and my overall posture had improved.  With just five minutes of stretching a day.

Eight days in, my body was doing better.  All because I didn’t quit, and that was due to my partner, the Buckeye.

At the Symphony. I remembered to say slàinte at dinner instead of cheers!!!

We decided to stretch everyday together, and add one minute a week to our routine until we get to 30. He’s just as inflexible as I am, and it’s a joy to start at the same point.  Lately we’ve hiked at least once a week together, and often I join him on his evening dog walk.

Constellation hike.

A few weeks ago, he had an unexpected call. He received an order on a product, and we decided to deliver it ourselves. The twelve hour road trip had an unexpected benefit; an hour from home he had an epiphany.  He was done seeking crumbs.

Everyday since has been amazing.

In a blink, the man I thought I had lost was back. 

This man: last seen in March 2018, seen here on 12/31/17.

My husband joined me in stretching daily (although he left Gaelic to me....oh!!! I love it! We hiked Ham and Cheese trail and I was all “Hama agus Cìas!”) and rejoined me in a life of walking by faith, not by sight.  2019 has been a rough year, and yet....

Manchild & Princess, laughing this morning at breakfast.

Joy has return to our home.

True joy, that is our strength and stronghold.  Just as I feel changes with just one week of stretching behind me, and I’m translating a word or four out of my week of studying Gaelic, so too is life in our family changing for the better.

Never has this been more true than this year.

Little steps. Little reminders. Partnership.

Already, 2020 will be better than I ever thought it could be :)

Praying it continues to be.

Stretching. Literally.

So my first thought is “will the . in the title be a . or a ridiculous mix of symbols when posted?!”

We’ll all know soon.

So this was the start to my morning.

I’m telling all of you out of hopes of actually continuing this...not that after FIVE YEARS of blogging I feel there’s any success in utilizing accountability as a factor in my fitness quest.

Actually, the only thing that keeps me returning to exercise is the thought of my grandmother in a wheelchair for 20+ years...and more recently, my mother’s health issues.  While both indulged in habits I have not indulged in (smoking by Nana, overweight by my Mom) I cannot help but see correlations. Neither looked after their health, and I admit I really don’t want to. I fully subscribe to being part of the 80% designed to survive war and famine.

Lol, she’s not really old. But good lord I’m wearing my hair like this when I’m gray!

The Buckeye and I watched the first season of Vikings over Thanksgiving, and I admit it reminded me of a different season in my life. When I tried to convince the King I was worthy of his love, by exercising and getting fit. Over the years I’ve struggled, knowing full well I need to get back to where I was when my hand broke. Between 150-155, and fit.

I’m definitely not there now!!!! 😂😂

It’s not a huge amount of weight to shift: 25lbs. I also have a genuine desire to move it.

Just no desire to exercise or diet.

So I’m trying things...like removing the clothing I love that doesn’t fit from my closet...and telling myself I have to give it away if it doesn’t fit in X number of months.

Problem is....I’m not certain that will work. 

What I do know will work? 

Getting rid of every size 12 pair of jeans...and the 10’s when they get too big.  

I have a double chin I’d like to get rid of, too.

So.

5-2.

But with a twist...hubby needs to go pescatarian.  Keto pescatarian. For actual legit health reasons; so more impetus to do it right.

Hence the yoga mat in my office.

Starting now, before the new year. With stretches.

Quite honestly, it’s a stretch.

I don’t want to do it. At all.  I’m perfectly content to stay exactly the weight I am. 

But, fitness quest.

Begin again.

I don’t want hindsight to be 20/20...I want 2020 to be the year I am proud of. For the first time in quite awhile.

5 minutes down.  1820 minutes to go!

I’ll be curious to see what next Christmas brings!

Changes

So, my little gym closed.

This was sent at 11:59pm the day before it closed!

Remember how much I DIDN’T want to go?!? And how I settled in? And found my groove? And benefitted from the work I did in August on my September honeymoon?!?

All. For. Naught.

I Facebook lived my distress as accountability for walking in. 

Poor Dude at the counter.  

Like Dude so did not deserve my angst, which I tried to dial back when it triggered him (literally.  I felt bad as I know his condition is physiological) but yet I needed to let him know so he could have his management reach out to me.  My old young kid at the counter at my old location (which is growing more dear to me by the moment!) had gotten used to my growls of discouraging banter...!! Still, Dude was super cool and even showed me where the arc trainers were.

They had 7.

This is a still from my video in which I remark that it smells like sweat. Note the 16 and the 45...back in early August that read 1 and maybe 10.

In my Facebook live, I make the comment that walking in alone is pretty difficult; that it’s same reason people don’t go to church.  It’s not fun to do either, but you know you should and supposedly you’ll feel better after both.

I don’t feel better though.

When I left, after a full blown bad asthma attack in the first third, I wanted to cry. I don’t like feeling bad after exercise. I want to have the happy rewarding exercise endorphins.  I know my honeymoon and the huge amounts of walking (AND CLIMBING!) we did were possible because of my month in the gym before we left.  I was just very tired of feeling bad.  So is the Buckeye.

Since his accident, he’s suffered from high blood pressure. He never had it before, and it’s a lingering injury. He takes a cocktail of prescription drugs every morning, while hiking hard two-three times a week to get his body back into shape. Rugby, unfortunately, is no longer part of his exercise regime.  We switched PCP’s this summer to one more proactive in getting him better (with or without prescriptions) and she suggested stepping down on one medication that was used for headaches (and had, in fact, been the drug in March that had stopped the constant headache he’d had since the accident in December.) In August he dropped his dose to the minimum, with awful mood swings...but he stuck it out. The headaches didn’t return, but he certainly didn’t feel better. Right before we left on our honeymoon, one of his specialists changed his blood pressure medications, as his prior regime still wasn’t getting it under control. The debate continued: was his blood pressure elevated still due to the injury or something else?

So while I complain of hating exercise and mild asthma, my hubby has dealt with crippling exhaustion, puddy-headness, and a body that seems to be refusing to heal. Add in brain days and yeah. It’s been super tough.

I love that he’s a trooper...but goodness. 

Two weeks ago, one of my carts needed work. My mechanic and his wife came to the house, and she asked me if the Buckeye had tried the CBD oil yet she had dropped off.  I had forgotten about it; we had decided he would try it after our honeymoon in case of adverse reactions. That night the Buckeye decided to drop the one medication he was on the lowest dose of (and had already had approval to drop from his doctor.) My research on CBD did show it triggered the same area of the brain as the medication he was dropping, so I figured it would be ok.

It wasn’t ok.

It was a miracle.

The puffy-headness, dry mouth and lethargy disappeared overnight. He woke up feeling normal for the first time in ten months. All day he kept texting me, telling me he felt amazing.  I was skeptical, but delighted...and on edge.  Would it last?

Multiple opportunities came up for brain days...many triggers presented themselves.  He remained unphased.  His energy increased, and I researched the drug he had gone off of.

He’d had every single side effect listed.  Now off the medicine, they were all gone.

While I debated whether it was simply going off the one med, or the substitution of the CBD (which his PCP has encouraged him to try) that made the change, I found myself leery.  Would this last? After a year of nothing but trials, I was hesitant to rejoice...even if it did seem like he was feeling back to his old self.

He took the doors off his Jeep😎

It’s like exercise and me: I see brief improvements, but it’s never lasted. Would this be different?

Back at my new gym, I’d settled in to going twice a week. I wasn’t happy, my weight wasn’t changing and I still had asthma but hey; I was going.  My blood pressure (which has always been normal) actually was getting better...110/70, as opposed to 120/80. I knew this only because we used my blood pressure to gauge if the Buckeye’s blood pressure machine was accurate. His had been in the 130/90’s...but had improved to close to normal the new medication over our honeymoon. 

This changed, too.

As the Buckeye continually felt better, we talked more about things we wanted to change. He admitted in his injury he had been unable to focus on little things, as he simply tried to survive. He started trying a bit, and I savored it.  Encouraged, I began researching other things we could do to improve our health. We talked about going back on the 5-2 diet, which we both had done so well on two years before...but I admitted I wasn’t committed to dieting right now. Life had been an emotional struggle for 18 months...and limiting my food wasn’t an option. My exercising was keeping my weight the same, so I felt no need to further tax my soul.  Then the Buckeye stumbled on an article about recent research on a medical condition he has, separate from the injury.  It suggested that ketosis (being in a fasting state) could reverse it.

Well, that made me do a double take.

While 5-2 was effective in this study, the 8 hour diet (eating in an 8 hour window, with 16 hours of fasting) was ideal. The researchers lamented most people couldn’t control their diet...but I saw hope.  So I researched it...and talked to the Buckeye. I’ve often said that breakfast was an invention of the rich, and rarely ate breakfast myself...so this would be an “easy”

diet for me. One week ago, we went on it.  Ate our first meal at noon, and made sure to finish eating by 8pm. Black coffee doesn’t break a fast, so that got us through the morning. The Buckeye also started taking his blood pressure meds at noon with lunch, as he needed to take them with food.  We planned to talk to the specialist about it, but didn’t think much else as we were doing this to try and reverse his medical condition that had nothing to do with his injury.

He’s been very, very happy as of late. Me? I had forgotten what a goofball he was!

Last night he glanced at his blood pressure machine, and asked me to take it. We’ve been awful in tracking it since we got home; since it had been consistently better in the mid 120’s over 80’s instead of 130’s over 90’s we simply weren’t as worried. The new med had worked, it was finally in the normal range with medications. Since he’s started the CBD, and his mood had so drastically improved, I really wasn’t thinking about his blood pressure.

So, I took it.

Then I took it again.

Then I took mine, to make sure it was reading correctly; it was.

So I took his again.

100’s over 60’s.  Three times.

Frankly, we were stunned.  (It also explained something light headedness he’d had that weekend!!)  While we know to be wise, and he’s not going off medication without doctor supervision...we are optimistic.  Further research into both fasting and CBD showed both have proven blood pressure reduction effects.

His hope is to go off all prescription medications. I’m hopeful I’ve got my husband back.

Does make it easier to go to the gym?  No. But I am reminded that making healthy choices doesn’t always mean you see the results.  But then there’s this:

Normally I struggle to burn 200 calories in 30 minutes...but my first time at the gym in a fast? 272.

Every visit to the gym since we went on the 8 hr diet I’ve burned almost a hundred more calories.

And I haven’t had an asthma attack.

Soooooooooo while it’s early, I’m slightly optimistic.  Could this change be a significant one? As I daily see my husband’s physical and mental health improve...I am cautiously less skeptical.  

Time will tell.

In the meantime, I’m not as saucy going to the gym. (Well, that’s a lie. I told the clerk at the desk that telling me to have a good workout was akin to me telling them to have a good bowel movement...)

Perhaps, just maybe, we have good days ahead.  What we do have, regardless, is a partner to go through it.  Even when I’m at the gym alone, or the Buckeye is on a job site.  And that we’ve come to remember, as a result of our honeymoon and the weeks since our return.  We aren’t in this alone. We are doing this together.  After simply surviving, we are adjusting to to getting better. Yes, there are still hard days. Yep, he’s still in recovery and we both need to lose 20 pounds. But we aren’t alone in this journey, and quite honestly, we are better together. 

And that I’m not skeptical about...and very much reassured on.