Sunday, August 28, 2016

Encouragement

I *think* my burn is starting to heal.  

 
I couldn't eat the yummy egg salad I had bought:(

A week ago, I happened to bite into a too hot meatball sub.

I knew I burned the roof of my mouth with the first bite, but it was 3:45, we were going to a 4pm movie, it was the first meal I'd eaten...so I took another bite after blowing on it.  Scalded again.

I clearly remember thinking I needed a cold drink at the movies, as I had at least three burns.  They hurt, but only in an annoying sense.  I'm not a believer in any pain meds, so my tolerance is pretty high.

Oh, how that was to be tested this week.

In the wee hours of Tuesday morning, I awoke in searing pain-the burn had become infected.  Coffee that morning wasn't possible, nor was my egg salad lunch finished.  Wednesday my lymph nodes were swollen, and only tepid water was noniritating.

With no fever, I added hydrogen peroxide rinses to my salt water rinses, and purchased no fewer than three oral analgesics. 

They burned to apply.

My face lit up with nerve pain, my teeth ached, my eyes watered and my ears rang.

By Thursday I had lost 4lbs, and jokingly referred to it as "my lose weight without exercising program."

 
I managed to drink my favorite Dutch Bros by sheer willpower.

A quick trip to the doctor confirmed second degree burns, but he didn't think it was infected.  Instead he prescribed steroids, to try and calm the inflammation.

I refused prescription pain meds, and resorted to Tylenol and Advil. Thursday night I barely managed ice cream-the cold burned, too.

 
Quite miserable.

Friday I was wretched.  No pain relief, and my fourth full day of no real food-just bits I managed to get down.  Add to it business delays, and I was ready to quit.

How far in one week had I fallen.

Did I mention my parents moved in with me, too?  

Exercise?  Never crossed my mind.

But a cold sore sprouted on my lip!  Let's add insult to injury.

But this happened:
 
Two drivable, with frames, carts.  Finally.

And this:

 
He played one and a half quarters of Varsity!

And this:
 
The Princess in marching band.  First instrument ever!

And this:
 
Dr. Cravath & I after our second old Arizona History lecture, "Honky Tonks, Brothels & Mining Camps."

And then the prednisone worked.  It still hurts, but I'm no longer in pain.  If I touch it (which is hard not to do!) it's sore.  The searing pain, however, is gone.

Funny how the physical & emotional tie themselves together.  A stressful week emotionally coupled with a physical injury....did one lend itself more to aggrevate the other?  

Apparently, if I exercised I might have felt better.

 
I admit, my Thursday morning hike on the Chino Peavine did me a world of good.

A massage on Friday reset me.

Ride will launch, maybe this week.

My parents are actually wonderful people, and we've already settled in well.

Jenny is here for the weekend, and Nathan came with her.  Manchild and he were born 7 weeks apart, and were best buddies for 5 years.  A move separated them, but yesterday you couldn't tell. 

I ate dinner last night.  This major milestone pleased me to no end:)

This last week was an intense roller coaster.  I was so weary due to the pain, it seemed no relief was in sight. I began to over analyze everything, and quitting seemed easier.
 
Once again, my dearest business partner was the shoulder to cry on.  He calmly redirected my efforts all day, and kept me on task.  In short, he gave me encouragement.

 
This is why we are business partners:  we have a vision we will achieve together.  He's strong where I am weak, and vice versa.  We will launch Ride...soon.

 
Still not quite there.

Encouragement.  Isn't that the basis of a partnership?  When it comes to exercise, I must have a partner.  Aren't we designed for partnership??  As a child, you have a parent partnered with you.  As an adult, most often, a spouse.  At work, coworkers.  In sports, a team.

Why in the hell isn't the fitness world geared this way?  Oh, I suppose classes count...but.  Where's the encouragement?

The 20% who just do it...is it because they are introverts who would rather be alone?! 

Sigh.

Encouragement. So thankful for my business partner, who soothed my soul by listening as I broke down and still believed in me, got me back on track, and didn't take (most of it) personally.  You're the best, Kyle.  We'd suck at being fitness partners or as life partners (haha!!  Sometimes I laugh that we tried to date!!) but as a business partner you rock.  #LYBP❤️
My fitness quest needs a partner.  It would make sense if it could be a potential partner in life, too.

Applicants can apply at Thumb Butte:)

 
You'll know where to find me.

Thursday, August 25, 2016

His Turn

So very, very proud.

 
My Manchild is the tallest helmet in the group.

At halftime the score was tied 0-0.  Manchild's first football game ever, and he's a lineman.

Just three weeks ago, I was worried for him.  He hated school, he had no real friends and life held no joy for him.  Our little dates no longer made him smile, and two vacations had not relit a spark.

 
It's a glorious evening in Arizona.

How quickly things can change when we least expect it.

Parry, my youngest and from here on out know as The Princess, had a secret all summer:  she was enrolled in two schools.  By the time school started, she had chosen her desired school, and begun lobbying hard.  Somehow she convinced her brother, and we made the switch to her desired school.

Which meant Manchild was now academically eligible to play football.

Last year was hard--the divorce, obviously--and I couldn't be hard on his lack of academic performance.  It had its own consequences...but with all light gone out of him, I was not willing to overlook this fluke opportunity to play.

He walked on the team with hours to spare; it was only lucky timing he joined when he did-a day later he would have been ineligible.

Then three weeks of conditioning:  he comes home exhausted, has lost nine pounds, and begun to smile.

Still 0-0 with 9 minutes left in the game!

School starts, he has friends for the first time.  His sister hears people talking about him-in a good way.

Tonight I watched my gangly son (sorry Lad, you got that from me) tackle and block, hustle and play.  He's glowing, and clearly loves what he's doing.

Is he ready?

No.

He has much to learn, he's not yet in shape, and his instincts are off.

Yet he's having the time of his life.

He'll learn the game.  He'll adapt, even though timing-wise, he wasn't prepared.

Did I push to help make this happen, when the opportunity arose?  Sometimes, you have to embrace the opportunity when it arises.

 
It was my birthday, but we were waiting to get him a physical.  Last second, indeed!

Even though I helped make it happen, ultimately it was his choice to follow through.

 
 They won!  12-0!!!


 

I'm so glad HE did.







Monday, August 22, 2016

Top of the World (or just Prescott)

Last fall, I came 10ft from the top of Thumb Butte, the local landmark at 6443ft.

 
Iconic Prescott, Arizona, with Thumb Butte rising in the distance.

Little did I know how my life would dramatically change within days of that fall climb; Callie's suicide and my divorce would forever alter it.  While life has only improved in the months since, my fitness quest has had many competitors for my time.  That fall climb seemed representative of much I'd experienced-almost achieving, but falling short.

And then getting repeatedly stuck.

Last year, stuck on Thumb Butte.

So when a hike up Thumb Butte was decided to be my fourth date with the Scientist, I admit that climbing to the top hadn't really occurred to me.

I was much more interested in breathing.

 
Thankfully, I was able to point out such fascinating things such as this alligator juniper, and while he snapped pictures, I sucked water and air.

While the air monster did join us on the hike, I did notice I was fitter.  I could talk (a notable improvement  over prior non-fit hikes) and the air monster attacks less severe.  I was surprised that my thighs were pretty sore, having completely forgotten my five-song workout from the day before.

 
 Edie and I out for the evening.  The five song workout of earlier in the day was already a distant memory, about to fade into oblivion.

Funny how a momentous, excuse-inducing, drama-filled workout was forgotten so quickly. It was only because my thighs were screaming that I chanced to remember it!  It made me realize two things:  1) that five-song workout has some serious merit if I'm sore the next day and 2) I can be a bit dramatic.

Move along, move along.

Anywise, my main goal for this hike was to not look like the completely unfit person I am (it was a date, afterall) and to, once again, reenergize my quest.

 
I forgot my sunglasses.  And sunscreen.

So when we decided to climb to the top, I thought we might get there. 

 
About 6000ft and near an exposed edge.

We actually stopped short at one point, at a lower edge of the top.  Suddenly the the tinkling sounds of children's voices broke the silence, and a dad and his three kids scampered past us, climbing right to the precipice. 

The view from not quite the top, Granite Mtn in the distance.

Like we were going to let a six year old beat us.

We figured out a route down from our outcropping, and maneuvered our way to the tiptop, only having to stop and ask for directions once.

 
The top of Prescott:)

As I threw my arms up for the photo, I immediately thought of being in this same position, only lying in a pool, exactly one week ago.

Life is getting better.

While there is much I cannot control, there is much I can.

Exercise is one of those things.

Hm.

 
I certainly don't look like I'm disliking exercise here, do I?

Today I woke up early, my legs deliciously sore from the climb.

Wanting to exercise.

Yesterday, I stood on top of the world.  Where could I stand if I chose to change what I could?

 
 This hair is going flame red soon:)

Exercise.  Ride Local.  Local M.O.B.

I control those.  It's time to make the change.

Saturday, August 20, 2016

Could it be?

Knowledge is power.

 
As is red lipstick, but that's another blog.

Exercise.  Fitness Quest.  The thing keeps haunting me, and I cannot get away from it.

 
Nor can I get away from my alma mater, wise and glorious, shrine of light and home of truth.  Amazing what memories pop up when the song unexpectedly pops up on your Mendellsohn Pandora station.

The past few weeks my exercise routine has consisted of cleaning and dancing....which, while wearing a corset, makes the latter rather a breathless experience.

 
As does riding in a car.  I was not happy here.  

However.  Exercise.

I took the time to reread portions of my blog this week (haha, to see what editing should rapidly be done) and I was again entranced by my quest.  With so much in my life in the control of others (home sales are by far the most out of control circumstances one can find themselves in) is my fitness quest the only thing I control outright?  Ride is still not launched due to waiting for others to complete tasks...but the Quest?  Is it my sole outlet for control?

Which leads to a new theory.  Is the 20% who actively participate in exercise control freaks?

Well.  Not control freaks as in psychologically unsound.  Freaks as in freaks of nature.

Digging a big hole here...!!!

 
Please remember that these opinions are expressed by a girl who is trying to decide on the next shade of her hair and these are her three favorite.  Grain of salt, please.

So let's go back a bit.

I've been rereading my blog. Then had several fascinating discussions about exercise psychology, followed by reading several academic papers on the subject.

Utterly fascinating.

 
 He ain't got anything on me.

An earlier theory of mine (formulated at CrossFit with the Professor and his minion Mr. Hottie) was that exercise could possibly be made palatable if the mind was first conditioned before exercise was ever contemplated.  Not moments before, but over time.

I believe I may have had my first experiment in proving it.

All week, I've been talking about exercise.  Gaining knowledge, exploring new ideas.  

 
Like Captain Crunch ice cream!!  Whose idea was this?  Incredible!!

While I had a few plans to exercise this week, I wasn't disappointed when rain cancelled them.  In fact, I was relieved.

 
Summer monsoons.  Rain on Table Top, sunshine on Granite.

So imagine my utter surprise when I woke up and wanted to ride my bike.

 
Maybe it's because I'm developing a health initiative for the Peavine Trail at work and I have this cool bike I got as a birthday present on my cork board?

Or maybe it's because all week my brain was inundated with the messages about exercise and why we do or don't?

Now let's throw in another factor.  Nothing I was reading about was motivational (have your read academic papers?  I rest my case.)  Not one "just do it" or "suck it up buttercup."  No cases for better health or lifetime longevity.  Just how the brain functions....and yet I was so intrigued.

With the research. Really.πŸ˜œπŸ˜‚
 
Earlier in the week I was intrigued by my meat laden Mac n cheese.  Really.

Yet today....I couldn't shake it.  I truly wanted to exercise.

I can sincerely say this has never happened in my entire life.

The journey to that actually happening, however, was frought with problems.  Getting dressed for one, that was an issue.  Problem was solved by staying in my pj's and just adding a bra.

 
Any chance to show off my Guns n Roses tee 😍
Then the issue of no water bottles.

And no clean water.

As each little hurdle was overcome, I had to wonder if my brain counted these as victories or rewardsπŸ€”
Then the defeat:  my tires needed air, and I could not find the pump.

That only left a 5-song workout.

I fretted.  I stalled.  I made videos while procrastinating.

And then I just did it.

 

Thankfully, Kyle called inbetween the sit ups and squats.  My business partner is awesome.

I finished the workout, and the most amazing thing happened.

I felt good.

 
WHY?!?

Why do I not regret it?  Why do I have an exercise buzz for the first time in my life?  Why do I feel like I do when I leave the Canyon?  Why do I feel it in my bones enough to make my systems roam?????? 

Fitness quest.  The most unreal experience of my life.  Did exposing my brain to the idea trigger something?  Is it physiological?  Or psychological?

All I know is this:  something changed.  I want to know what it is.


Monday, August 15, 2016

Floating

I've known for many years that the trifecta of sport in my life was hiking, biking & swimming.

 
The pool is were I work best.

The last two mornings I had this pool to myself for several hours; I swam laps and then taught myself what I once thought impossible.

I learned to float.

All my life, my legs would sink and down I'd go.  In pool class I'd have to tread water to stay afloat, while my classmates blissfully relaxed.  Yesterday, however, I was determined to learn...and determined to think.

Concussions are not fun.  I can't say exactly how disruptive this last one has been (the headaches are a clear indication it's not completely better) but the ability to focus has been compromised.  I can feel the cognitive slip, regardless of how I try, and I have not returned to Pilates (not that it would harm me further but trying to get Ride up and running has consumed my every free second.)  So after a week at the Arizona Rural Policy Forum, I headed to Scottsdale for business and a break.

Swimming.  It's contemplative, just like hiking and biking.  I love it, but rarely indulge.  Being cold is such an anathema I don't seek out the pool as exercise except in the summer heat, when the pool feels like a bath.  As I felt my body lift and drift as I floated for the first time, my mind wandered over the problems needing solving; tinkering with one solution, finessing another, and pushing aside stray thoughts to focus on the business at hand.

 
Desert sunrise.

Much like the sunrise this morning, my thoughts coalesced together and it quickly became clear what needed to be done.  Hopping out of the water I jotted it all down, then jumped right back in.  I love swimming.  While I'm not passionate about it-I truly love it.  The cold has kept me out of the water forever, and suddenly it occurred to me.  

Why don't I just buy a wetsuit?

πŸ’‘

Yes, the aha moment.  If I had a wet suit, I could stay warm while swimming.

Only took 45 years, folks.

 
Tonight I bought these sparklers at Last Chance, for the bargain price of $5.  Admittedly, they reminded me of something Kate Middleton wore (although hers were Jimmy Choos) and I could not resist them.

They are fun.

Life is fun.

It's time to celebrate:  I'm buying a wetsuit:)

Sunday, August 7, 2016

And then...

Tomorrow I shall be 45.

There's no way to make an 8 out of it (44 is obviously 4+4=8, like that did me any good at all!)

Ride Prescott is gearing up to launch, with the acquisition of our third cart:

 
I've been assured by a PhD in cultural anthropology that calling this cart Honky is completely acceptable.

Unfortunately, purchasing this vehicle, and bringing up Greenie meant I missed a week of Pilates.

Then I missed another week of Pilates.

I have no hope of returning right now - I've had another concussion, and I'm honestly overwhelmed.

 
Don't they look new?  Everyone thinks they are!  We scrubbed them good to get them this way!

The crazy up and downs of a business launch: simple things getting complicated, people helping (or not helping) and the misunderstandings that arise....fold in rejection, my number one life-long enemy and you have an unstable mix.  Add to it another concussion...?!

 
Technically, it wasn't Indie's fault.

The concussion was caused by me missing the fact the lower closet rod bar had a wooden support, and in looking for the kitten Indie (who belongs to a friend, I'm merely kitten-sitting) I walloped my head good and hard on it.  Given the fact I had a mild concussion two months ago and you have a girl who used her five days off for her birthday to do nothing but clean and heal.

And time travel.

 
My alter ego, Cordelia Kirk, steampunk time traveler and co-presenter at the Western History Symposium with Dr. Jay Cravath.

Exercise?

Bah.  Cleaning and scrubbing will have to do for now.

Bike rides?

I wish.

I'm missing my exercise partners.

 
My feet are tired.

So.  It's almost my birthday.  I'm officially old tomorrow, but I am again reminded:  the best is yet to be.

I think I need to make it so :)