Insights

This week I empathized with a woman I've never met, as I see startling similarities despite different choices.

I'm beginning to see it so differently now.

My heart broke for her; I wept for her.  The depth of understanding shook my core, and I prayed for her.  

I could not pray for her husband.

She is blamed for her actions, yet his initial actions and later response over time is far crueler than her indiscretions.  The root cause of so many heartbreaks between a man and wife start with a simple thing:  a man ignoring his wife.

It doesn't matter what she's done; or if he's simply too exhausted and stretched himself.  The truth is he first uncovers her, and it leaves her vulnerable.

Uncovering:  when a wife no longer feels emotionally protected by her husband. The consequences vary, but always it leaves a path of destruction in its wake.

Only the man can rectify it.  Only a husband can bring his bride back under the shelter of his protection.  In the relationship between men and women, there are certain things only one can do:  only a woman can bear children, for example.  In this marital breakdown, caused by the man, only the man can fix it.

If he first stops thinking only of himself.

In the meantime, she is left to repeat mistakes, seeking only the protection he removed.  

The cycle repeats if the man waffles; his lack of decision makes matters worse.  

I'm watching from afar this scene unfold while dealing with my own heart...and I realize there is so much we judge about other women.

When their hearts beat as ours do.  As they fall prey to the insecurities their man exposes them to.  As they make choices that others judge on the surface, refusing to examine the cause.

As I prepare to re-enter the industry I love, my eyes are open for the hurt, the uncovered, the abandoned.  It has always been my desire to help them, but now I feel as if I come from a place of understanding them.

Men, wake up.  You have far more power over us than you know.  Use it wisely; you create more situations that you resent than you'll ever know. Think first of her, regardless of her sins.  Be the man she needed-recognize your own failings towards her.  For truly it is you who guards her gate...and only you who can swing it wide open.

Apple Roses

I worked late tonight, and then drove straight to another meeting.  My youngest kept blowing up my phone, and  I answered it snapping, "what do you want?"

Not inaccurate.

"I'm making you Apple Roses and wanted to know when you'd be home."

For the uninitiated, these are to which she refers:

http://youtu.be/_Dirf_QHDCw

I shared it earlier this week on Facebook.

This has been a tough week.  Today was probably my best day, as I start to settle in a bit.  Last night was little date with Lad:

Plane junkies.

B-47's did nothing for me, but the film of three B-52's taking off, followed by their tankers was exhilarating.  The talk also encouraged me as a programmer...even five-time aviation hall of fame inductee's aren't the best at public speaking.

Today I resolved to do the things I've always wanted to do...and that meant a ride in a helicopter simulator tonight.

Note the start of a double chin.  Sigh.

It was so realistic I got airsick.  Thinking that helicopter lessons are probably not for me.

He probably agrees.

OH!!!  That reminds me.  Happy news, my new iPhone 6s's name is Goose.

It's rose gold and has gold honeycomb and black bees on it.  The name is perfect!

My old iPhone 4s's name was TK421.

I miss TK421.

My 5s always irritated me so I never named it.

ANYWISE...

Two-stepping.  It's on the no regrets agenda.  Probably need to take a fixed-wing discovery flight.  Trying two new companies and helping a third.  These are all good things.

As is this.

My sweet daughter made me Apple Roses.  They were yummy, but I know I stole some of her thunder with my curt answer to her seventh text/call.

I hate that.

The lesson I'll take from the Apple Roses:  Love never fails.  Regrets aren't always the opportunities you didn't take.

Upside Down

I did hike last week.  Butte Creek, after another thwarted attempt at Thumb Butte.  Why they don't let you hike it in the dark is beyond me.

It wasn't that dark!!

It's not been a good week.  A lot of time cooling my jets, looking to my catapult officer for directions and finally-clearance.

One of my last blurred iPhone 5s selfies...

Takeoff was smooth, but immediately I experienced unexpected turbulence.

Apparently I wasn't flying the plane?

Plain and simple, things have not gone as I've hoped.

Hopefully MSU will know the feeling Saturday, and OSU next month...

You see, life is just completely upside down, and I've no idea how to right it again...or if I should right it at all.

Does art heal the heart?  I can only hope.

So I'm searching.  I've thrown three irons in the fire, hoping against hope one of them is the right fit.

As you can see, I'm full blown stressed.  Yes, that's buttermilk.

Tonight, fitness of my body is furthest from my mind.  I'm homesick, and I just want to go home.  

Instead...

I'll make this work.

No Regrets

It's a crazy life right now.

I ate beef stew and liked it.

I hate beef stew. Or so I thought.

Crazy.

Work is fine, although I wish I had more to do (am I the only person to wish this?)

Hopefully my new phone camera will capture these images better.

It's been awhile since I hiked, but I have hopes that will change a lot shortly.

Itching to use these poles.  The hand is definitely on the mend.

This quest was begun to find fitness; instead I found injury.  As my body finally heals I think only of hiking and getting back to the canyon; that's ok.

So not fair.

This guy controls jets.  Far more fun, if you ask me.

I discover NaNoWriMo yesterday, and intend to write a novel next month.

Because if I don't write it, I'll always regret it.

Regrets-the fear of them is driving me as of late, and that doesn't seem right.  I am hoping as I go back to what I know, more and more things will start turning around for the better.

And as you can see, I felt right at home at an AU event.

Right this minute, I've got plans to pursue.  As I walk out the door, my sole hope is that someone pursues me.

Conquests

We are gearing up for some changes, and that tends to put people on edge.

Unless you're me, and you see it as an excuse to wear Minnie Mouse sequined ears.

I love change, and tend to excel at doing it quickly.  Of course, that was before I had a broken hand for twenty-two weeks.

Look!  I'm wearing a ring and two bracelets!  Approved to five pounds!!

I've been tasked with NOT doing as much as I'd like, and that's been difficult at times.

Especially when you can't find a paint stir.

Or proper grouting tools.

Let's just say plans I thought were good weren't (*cough*hussey*) and things I needed quickly came from surprising sources (Ian is my hero.). Regardless, in the end everything will get done, and I'll be happy.

Maybe.

Unless I'm forced to eat this awful stuff.

This week has been actually really good.  Stuff is getting done, and I got to see grandkitten Thor.

He's getting big!!

I had two crazy late nights-

One rather stressful...

And one absolutely stress-busting.  This is grandkitten Thor's other grandma!!

It was a good week at work, too.

Really, this WAS a great week, despite the stresses.

I met a former fighter pilot who did Mach 2 and wrote bar notes like this...

And I had this awesome sign...

So by Saturday I felt like this:

Feeling as wide-eyed as Luke Skywalker as he headed towards his future.

At the end of the day...

:)